Wednesday, March 27, 2013


Well, I'm still pregnant. I should expect to be, considering I'm only 38 weeks. I've been so antsy about just having the baby already. I'm uncomfortable, irritable, and ready to be able to roll over in bed without it hurting. After talking without my midwife yesterday, and taking some real quality time snuggling my kids one on one, I realized how much potential there is there. Here I've been whining and boohing about how done I am and how I can't wait to meet this little one and all that, that I have not really celebrated the last few weeks/days/moments I have with just me and my 4 children. There is about to be a shifting of balance in our family. How quickly I forget how important it is to really feed into the needs of each of my children, when I'm so busy thinking of my own wants. It was so nice to just snuggle each of the ones who wanted snuggles and to let them know, mama still loves them. I hadn't realized how much our quality time was suffering, with my birth preparations and self centeredness.

With a new baby on the way and sports season picking up, it's even more vital that I make sure that we have genuine quality time together. Not just being in the same place at the same time, or doing school work together, or any of that. Time having fun, smiling, and laughing together is what my kids seem so hungry for. You'd think that would be easy, but we busy ourselves so much that there are nights I lie in bed thinking about how little I truly interacted with my kids.

On a more positive note, last night I celebrated the Passover for the first time since I was around 10. I know these festivals are not required and some would even say it is wrong to celebrate them. (I have been told this) It was a Messianic sedar. I found the "ceremony" to be interesting and am glad I participated. There are so many things in the old testament that when we look at Jesus we see them fulfilled. I want my kids to understand that.

I'd write more, but my boys are now awake and asking for some attention. I'm going to take advantage of that.

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